Just received this email from my wife (doing the rounds) and thought I should share it with you…the lighter side of the tourism industry. These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were answered by the website owner (great sense of humour!).
Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa ? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? ( UK )
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.
Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it’s only two thousand kilometres take lots of water…
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa ? ( Sweden )
A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes..
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa ? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town , Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? ( USA )
A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the pacific. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not…oh forget it. Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.
Q: Which di rection is north in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is…oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa ? ( France )
A: No, WE don ‘t stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere where a significant number of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.
Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa ? ( Germany )
A: Not yet, but for you, we’ll import them.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round?
A: No, we are a peaceful civilisation of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can di spense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will probably still have to pay her by the hour.
Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first.
Blogger Muzi Mohale
I’m Muzi Mohale, based in Roodepoort (South Africa). Blogger with www.travelwires.com. Love Travelwires.com since I get to travel our beautiful country through blogging and get first hand tourism experience.
The answers are really funny
The answers are really funny
The answers are really funny
Ah, yes. The ever popular myth that South Africa is no more than a little wild uncivilised spec on the dark continent of Africa lives on!
Ah, yes. The ever popular myth that South Africa is no more than a little wild uncivilised spec on the dark continent of Africa lives on!
Ah, yes. The ever popular myth that South Africa is no more than a little wild uncivilised spec on the dark continent of Africa lives on!
NOW NOW!! Exception taken to the Hillbrow jokes of the 60′s. Yes, you guessed – I used to live there and it was a young, vibrant, throbbing centre where NOT ALL THE GIRLS WERE HOOKERS!! Perhaps the remark relates to the penchants of the writer!
NOW NOW!! Exception taken to the Hillbrow jokes of the 60's. Yes, you guessed – I used to live there and it was a young, vibrant, throbbing centre where NOT ALL THE GIRLS WERE HOOKERS!! Perhaps the remark relates to the penchants of the writer!
NOW NOW!! Exception taken to the Hillbrow jokes of the 60′s. Yes, you guessed – I used to live there and it was a young, vibrant, throbbing centre where NOT ALL THE GIRLS WERE HOOKERS!! Perhaps the remark relates to the penchants of the writer!
Funny but check out this site for real/helpful Question and Answers about SouthAfrica and the coming worldcup
.-= mathew´s last blog ..WorldCup2010 commercials =-.
Funny but check out this site for real/helpful Question and Answers about SouthAfrica and the coming worldcup
.-= mathew´s last blog ..WorldCup2010 commercials =-.
Funny but check out this site for real/helpful Question and Answers about SouthAfrica and the coming worldcup
.-= mathew´s last blog ..WorldCup2010 commercials =-.
hahaha this is the funniest stuff eva!
hahaha this is the funniest stuff eva!
hahaha this is the funniest stuff eva!